Music Meri Jaan

Music Meri Jaan...one of the finest experiences of the 44 years of my life. It was a boring dusty day of latter part of 2011,  when I was immersed in the daily grind of Noida to Meerut, which was my destination of work everyday...a day when I was more worried to come with new and newer ideas of how to 'sell' the courses in media that I was in charge of as the Academic Head of a media institute tucked away in a small city of North India pretty close to New Delhi.
In the daily grit and grime of last many years, where inspite of working in the field that has always been close to me since childhood, my creative side had taken many a beating. Where the zenith of career could be reached by just adorning a big designation and not so big salary! Where the joi de vivre was not to do what you love..but to love what you are doing...where somewhere you inadvertently lose yourself...

On one such day, the germ of making my own movie was put in my clogged brain by none other than my own elder sister( Anuradha aka Anshu)...someone whose wishes have usually been my command...whose dreams have usually revolved around mine...and whose footsteps have usually matched mine, however many stumbles they might encounter...hence the germ of making a film seemed an obvious development in my brain because it had to BE.

As I said my footsteps matching my sister's had some positive repercussions down the years, most important of which being that I somehow became 'creative' ( though I still haven't understood what this means), but to my knowledge, I started creating...stories, concepts,ideas....and even some cliched poems! Hence the germ of idea to create a 'Feature Film' seemed natural! Afterall, if my sister feels and thinks I can make a film...sure I can!!!

Cut To 2012, Jan , my nimble fingers which have always somehow been fastest on the keyboard ( wish they had been fast on paper during my school, then I would have had a halo of achievement much much before..been a beaurocrat or a topcop or a haloed professor)...the same fingers moved fast and furious to complete my first screenplay ever written by me inspite of having been in non fiction world of television. Balancing my daily Noida-Meerut routine with the nocturnal screenwriting exercises, I was able to finish my first draft flat in 3 months...I thought haste is going to be a waste...

Once again my sister came to my rescue...she liked what she read...and having the ' real creative genes' of my highly erudite family, I had to trust her!

Thus started the journey of my first feature length Bollywood ( popular name hence I'm using) film...

Cut To Mid March, 2012...

I packed my bags and baggage to come down to Indore, to take guidance from my sister and family members, do the planning...planning for the film...to finish what I had started...to complete the script and to make the film!

Amongst other things, one thing that I'm proud of  achieving now after many years of sheer practice is the ability to exude confidence and positive energy in the darkest of times...which very cleverly hides the quakes and shudders of uncertainty...of nervousness...and lack of knowledge beautifully...

This confidence made me plan and execute the film, just the way I wanted, trusting my instinct and my gut feeling. If I felt the film demanded an pan India audition instead of a typical casting method for selection of cast, I went ahead with it...Resulting in fresh and talented people who did not disappoint me.

If I wanted to create the set and setting in Indore, and call professionals from Mumbai, I went ahead and it was successful. I trusted my inner voice in the selection of my crew, creative and technical crew members, I again gave in to my gut feeling...and result was a very cohesive, balanced, dedicated and professional team that worked round the clock, enjoyed the shoot and helped me LEARN and UNDERSTAND the minute details of the process of film making. An enervating experience...making me alive......helping me be the captain of my ship...making me realise my importance...my responsibility...thus...teaching me humility....

Each gruelling day of planning, scheduling, editing and re editing the script, getting in touch with each aspect of my film...art...music...set...costume...makeup...properties...catering...logistics...finance...artists...and above all being in control of my emotions...each moment was worth it...each moment made me stronger in my resolve to make the film with success...on time...without any glitch...with self motivation...and motivation from my' team'...a word I've learnt to respect highly!

And thats what happened...with the completion of the film in 35 days...it paved way for my onward journey...that yes...I can and will make this film.

Cut To July-Aug, 2012, the film is on its way to get its shape and style...the characters emerge before my eyes giving that final shape...the story unfolds...the miracle of technique, creativity, planning and hard work emerges in its full shape and appearance..making me hold my breath...and make me think...just for a moment...This is not ME but US that has created it...and I wait for the bouquets or brickbats?

Moment to watch out for...